i’m searching for something currently that i know is in me. happiness. peace. creativity. all these things exist in me, and i know they do because i have felt them. a lot. on too many occasions to count. but for some reason they have been hard to come by lately. i’m not sure why. is it the weather change from summer to fall/winter? is it the fact that i still don’t know what i’m passionate about & really want to do with my life (i thought moving accross the country might help me with an answer here….)? am i getting complacent & comfortable & bored in my new city? who knows.
but what i do know is that there is a little voice in my body that constantly reminds me that i have all these beautiful qualities in me. i have all the tools i need already to experience happiness, peace, & creativity. for some reason it’s just harder for me to access these qualities at certain times. BUT this little voice is everything. she is my inner best friend. she reminds me that even when i might not be feeling it, i AM happiness, i AM peaceful, and i AM creativity. i am everything i want to be.
life is here. it is going on right now. i am committing to living it no matter what. whether i am feeling down or feeling so alive. there is a place for me to live in both of those mindsets, and they are worth diving into. diving into the low feelings is still feeling, and i’d rather feel something than be numb. also, diving into and feeling the low feelings make feeling the high feelings that much better. otherwise, i am just staying constant, neutral, robotic, & numb. no thanks.
so, cheers to diving. whether it’s low or high or just deeper into what’s going on between your ears. may we never stop living, diving, & exploring.